Motivation Archives - Page 2 of 2

September 11, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Starting Over

Hi friend,

You can start over again.
You can decide that today is a new day.
You can choose what you do and how, no matter what's going on in life.
You can love yourself and your life right now by APPRECIATING WHAT IS.

That's the message that came through loud and clear on my birthday last week. Two days beforehand, I was rushed to the ER, thinking I was having a heart attack. Fortunately, all checked out and I'm super healthy, but it was definitely a wake-up call for me.

It made me ask:

How do I want to live?
What matters most?
What is all this for?

This isn't the first time I've asked these questions, and it probably won't be the last. We go through spirals in life – ups and downs and curves – and we often have to get off track in order to begin again more strongly.

Every moment – even the challenges – is for purpose.

Often, the challenges show us how strong we are, how resourceful, resilient and capable we are. Often, challenges make us appreciate what we have even more.

I've been watching the hurricanes and praying for the survivors, sending money and packages, wondering how people will rebuild everything. And then this weekend I met a family who escaped Miami with nothing but their passports, their wedding photo, and a whole lot of gratitude that they were alive, together, and able to afford to get away. They knew they could start again.

And here we are on 9/11, an anniversary that reminds us of how resilient we are, and shows us that we can not only start over, but that the challenge can empower us to rebuild higher and become stronger.

I was teaching this concept in a workshop at PBS headquarters last week, and we all realized that we have done this in our lives and can do so again. You can do this, too. You can look at any challenge you're having as a catalyst for growth. From going off of your diet, to overwhelm with kids going back to school, to a parent's illness, to abandoning your dream of being a writer, you can start again. You can use it as fuel for growth and let desire consume your mind so that you choose for this to be a moment of purpose.

This is not to minimize the pain or suffering, or to say, “Just get over it.” You must feel all of it, being gentle with yourself and allowing grief. And then you can grow.

Post-Traumatic Growth (PTG) is rising to a new level of functioning as the result of adversity. In other words, it's growing not “despite” challenge, but because of it. Researchers Tedeschi and Calhoun found that we all can experience PTG and not just start again, but start better, stronger, and more alive.

So what challenge are you experiencing? How can it help you grow? Here are a few questions to journal about:

What does this experience show me about my strength and courage?
What do I now appreciate as a result of this?
Which relationships can this help me to strengthen?
What wisdom do I wish I had known? (Said another way, what would I now share with a 20 year old to help them manage this?)
What would it look like to choose a new way?

So my love, what do you need to do this afternoon or tomorrow to start again? How will you choose to treat a new day? What will you promise to love about yourself and your life right now, as is? I'd love to hear from you.

With so much love,
Carin

PS – If you're struggling with overcoming a current or past challenge, email me. It's my honor to do a 30-minute call with you and identify what you want and where the blocks are.

If you want to discover who you are and your true purpose… if you're ready to claim your birthright of joy and self-love, if your heart is calling for transformation this fall, then I invite you to email me now. I can't wait to connect with you!

August 21, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Making Changes

Good morning friend!

If you could change anything in your life, what would it be?
So what's stopping you?

I'm typing to you from a Bed & Breakfast where I'm hosting a client for a VIP Intensive to help her step into her full power. When we planned this months ago, I had no idea that today would be the solar eclipse, but I'm so glad it is.

This is a powerful week of change and it's already begun. This past week broke my heart. As the grandchild of Holocaust survivors, I'm a proud Jewish woman. My grandparents (and millions of other Jews, Catholics, Gypsies, Disabled, and many others) suffered at the hands of HATE.

If you're like me, the events in Charlottesville left you confused, angry, sad, and frustrated about what you can do about it.

You have the ability to make change and it starts with YOU. You becoming the brave, bold, purposeful person you were born to be.

With the eclipse – the moment when the moon (feminine energy) moves over the sun (masculine energy) – it's the perfect time to awaken the fierce warrior of love within. We all have feminine and masculine energies within us. The masculine is the “DOing” and the feminine is the “BEing”. The divine fierce feminine is the place of:

Unconditional love and acceptance
Compassion and truth
Passion and creativity
Protection like a lion over her cubs

Whether you're a man or a woman, change begins by allowing yourself to express the powerful feminine within and here's how.

3 steps:

1. CLEAR: We all live with a lot of clutter – in our homes, at our desks and in our minds – and in all that chaos and noise, you can't hear your heart's desire or soul's purpose. A lot of our clutter represents the past – clothes that no longer fit, underwear that should have been thrown out long ago, and regrets or worries about what you should have done or what someone else did (or is doing/will do) to hurt you. During this eclipse, clear out the old and make space for new changes. Physically clear space in your closet or desk. Mentally, write a letter of forgiveness (even if you never send it) or make a list of the nasty thoughts in your head and burn it. Take time this week to clear.

2. STILL: Your life will control you unless you take charge to control it. Your mind will run crazy unless you decide to focus it. You must slow down and get still to hear what's in your heart. Something in you wants more. Something in you yearns to make a difference. Something in your heart is calling you forward. Today and this week, take 10 – 15 minutes every morning to breathe, meditate, stretch your body and journal. Here's a link to one of my meditations to help you. When you journal, ask your heart questions, like “How do you want to feel?” “What matters most?” If your mind answers, tell it thank you, and then get back to your heart.

3. PASSION: Now is the time to awaken the divine purpose within you. You have strengths and talents and wisdom that the world needs now. What cause have you wanted to get involved in? Who could benefit from your story? You have a unique Purpose Power that is yours alone and it's inside of you. Let yourself take action this week – action from a place of love (not fear), passion (not apathy), and compassion (not hate).

Here's to your making changes from your Purpose Power!

With so much love,
Carin

July 25, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Don’t Let Your Dreams Die With You

7 years ago, my friend Ed drowned to death, and I couldn't save him. I dedicate this post to him.

It was a beautiful July morning, just 5 weeks before I was heading off to graduate school for Positive Psychology to finally pursue my dreams. My friend Ed had never been on a boat, and had never been in Lake Erie either. I couldn't wait to take him out.

So a week later, he met me at the dock and we began taking on the free waters. He laughed and shouted with joy. I'd never seen him so happy!

We then anchored and with a huge smile on his face, Ed dove in. I immediately saw that he was struggling, so I turned the boat to be a bit closer to him. He didn't move so I started throwing him a rope screaming, “Ed, get the rope!!! ED, GET THE ROPE!! EDDDDDDDD GET THE ROPE!!!!!

Seconds later, his head fell below the surface of the water, and he never came back up.

After weeks of trauma wanting to give up on school and life, I finally learned that Ed's body had been chock full of cocaine. Apparently, after being rejected from the military two weeks earlier, he turned to heavy drugs to numb the pain. It's like he had a death wish.

Ed's death is a constant reminder of why we must live our purpose WHILE WE'RE ALIVE.

What are you waiting for?

Why aren't you going for it fully? If you're like me, you're scared. Years ago, I sat on my KNOWING that I was here to inspire and support you because I was too afraid of leaving my safe job. I was too afraid of being rejected. I was so afraid of failing. So I stayed stuck. And then the pain of being stuck became so bad that I got sick until eventually the pain of staying stuck became worse than the fear of possibly failing. I knew that if I came to the end of my days without ever trying to live this purpose, I'd regret it forever.

Do you want your dreams to die with you like Ed's did? Why do you have painting talent if not to share your gift with others? Why do you have ideas about politics, if not to help your community? I know it's scary, and I know that your brilliance is not meant to die.

Your purpose is bigger than you. If you have a book idea, then those words are meant to help someone else. What good do those words do sitting in your journal and dying with you in the grave? If you dream of starting an animal shelter, it's because there are puppies in mills who need your help. Do you want to die with them?

This may sound dramatic, but having survived being robbed at gunpoint and having lived through Ed's death, I know too well how short life is.

Do not let your dreams die with you. And if you don't know what your dreams are, and you only know that you feel stuck and lost, then let this be your wake up call to start the process of figuring it out.

Find a mentor, join a mastermind, do a program to get clarity on who you are and what you want.

No matter what you do, take action today. For Ed. Ed's legacy lives on through us following our hearts. Sending so much love to Ed's family.

With so much love,
Carin

PurposeGirls on Fire – Real success stories of people who are going for it!

Brigid had always wanted to be an artist. She just loved painting and had always loved the stroke of a brush. But as a young girl, she kept seeing commercials for “starving artists.” She didn't want to starve, so understandably, she gave up painting. Brigid went on to start a successful printing business with her partner, but twenty years into her business and life as wife and mother, she lost her spark. Life took over and she became depleted. She heard about my offer for a free 30-minute call and within moments of talking, she declared her desire for change. She joined my EMPOWERED program and within our first two weeks of working together, Brigid remembered her first love: being an artist. She came home from the first EMPOWERED retreat so light that everyone at home noticed a change. She started painting at home and began to feel alive. She then started bringing her art talent to her business, and she felt on purpose. Doing graphic design, creating new project ideas, and bravely sharing her talent with clients, for the first time in a long time, Brigid fell in love with life. She knew she needed more space to create, so she asked her partner if they could get rid of the futon in the spare bedroom so that she could set up a studio. Just a few weeks ago, Brigid not only set up her studio, but she also sold her first painting! No “starving artist” for her!! I love this photo of her painting with the woman who bought it, and I love this picture of the FIRST (but not last) check she's received for her painting talent. Join me in CONGRATULATING Brigid on being a kickass woman on purpose. To learn more about her and her graphics arts, painting and printing business, check out Creative Characters here.

April 17, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

No More Excuses – Get Going!

So you have a project or a dream you’ve been wanting to do…
…But you just can’t find time to do it.
…Or when you have time, it’s after work and you’re exhausted, so all you want is to drink wine and watch This Is Us.
…Or you make special time for it, but when you sit down, the inspiration is gone.
…Or you’re super inspired and FINALLY going for it – but you don’t have the money.
…Or your dog ate the materials… You get the idea.

We all have a million excuses why we aren’t doing what we want to do.

Even me. This morning, I outed myself to my Marketing Assistant. She’s been telling me to do more Facebook Lives because I want to impact more people and set the path to more TV appearances, but I keep not doing it.

So this morning, I dropped the excuses and got real.

I’m not doing them because I’m afraid of rejection. I used to do a video with every newsletter, but I felt stupid because my YouTube “likes” were small.

A client in my EMPOWERED program said she had no time to work out because of her kids, so I suggested they come on a walk with her. No excuses – get moving! A client in my F*Midlife program said she couldn't travel because of money, so I suggested she do a garage sale. No excuses – get moving!

What about you? What's the real reason you aren’t doing what you want? Hint: It's not your husband or job or time or money.

It's Fear. It’s that simple – and that hard. Our biology makes us desperate to belong so we fear failure, rejection, and other people’s opinions. You create mean nasty inner voices that tell you you’re afraid you'll never be thin, so you don't try, or you're not “good enough” to paint, or you're “stupid” to leave your job and start a business, or not deserving of spending money on yourself.

But the voices are lies to protect yourself from being hurt. Fortunately, brain research shows that as adults, we can choose to think about it differently. It's called “reframing” and it helps you get unstuck and get moving! If “only” 5 people watch my Facebook Live, then I impact 5 lives! If no one watches, then I evaluate the time of day, content, or just chalk it up as experience. (I have to tell you – that feels so much better!)

So, today, I’m moving past my fear, as I always have. When I was afraid of leaving my corporate job to follow my dream, or afraid that SiriusXM would reject me, I took a deep breath, reframed the opportunity, told myself how awesome I am, and moved forward! You can do it too!!

Below is a video I taped for you to get out of your own way, too. And TONIGHT, I’ll be live-streaming “Make Monday Happy” for free on my business Facebook Page at 6 pm. (Click here to follow the page and get notifications whenever I go live.)

You too can drop the excuses and shift your thinking, and you can get started now!

“See” you tonight – Remember, 6 pm HERE for my live, short webinar “Make Monday Happy.”

XO,
Carin

PS – If you need help getting unstuck, take the step to join me on a retreat, or email me for 1:1 coaching. I will help you clarify your desires, get out of your fear, and move forward!!!

April 3, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Feeling Stuck or Down? This Easy Tip Will Help!

I'm SO excited! I'm on a bus to NYC for the week, so I'll make this quick. I was feeling stuck recently and asked myself 3 critical questions that have have seriously skyrocketed my feeling of empowerment and joy! Researcher David Cooperrider of Case Western Reserve University says that when we want a different answer, we have to ask a different question.

Why I was stuck… When I married Josh I gave up my dream of living in New York. My compromise was to live in Philly until his son graduated high school, under one condition – we would never move to the suburbs. It's not that I have anything against the suburbs; they just don't feed my soul like a city does. I need lots of diverse people, art, noise, and lights to feed my creative fire.

But then the city public schools became worse. Then his son's mom had some personal issues. And everyone agreed that the suburban school was the right place for him.

So off to the suburbs I went. We bought a beautiful house and I tried to have a good attitude, but with every passing day, I've felt more stuck. And the more stuck I feel, the more resentful I become of Josh. It's been super hard – especially since I'm always telling you that you must follow your heart's desires and soul's dreams no matter what!

But this is how it goes for all of us. You know what you want or you have an idea, but you make a compromise for someone you love, or you become afraid because someone said it was silly or selfish. So you back away from your idea and then feel small, caged, stuck, and even resentful or angry.

So I used my 3 favorite happiness + success questions and found a perfect solution that I'm SOOO excited about!!

1. How Can I? For two years, I've told myself “I can't live in New York City.” I convinced myself that I was stuck, and as a free spirit, that kind of cage was just making me more miserable and resentful. So recently, I used my favorite question, “How can I?” to see what else was possible. That's when my coach suggested that I live in NYC 3 days a week – that I commute, like so many do. It was so simple. So easy. Like, “duh!” Why didn't I think of that? To be honest, I had, and Josh had, but I had been scared. I didn't want him to resent me. I thought I was selfish for wanting it. I projected that it would be too expensive and it just wasn't feasible. I'm sure you get this. I'm sure you have all sorts of things you want to do that you tell yourself are impossible. You make up stories that people will be upset with you. You project what will go wrong. We all do this – and there go our dreams and our happiness.

So every time you hear yourself say, “I can't do that… it's too expensive… it's too risky… it's not practical” (etc, etc), ask, “How Can I?” and watch how this empowered stance instantly makes you feel happier and stronger!

2. Who Can Help? So when you have an idea but you have no idea how to do it, this is your next happiness + success question. When my coach suggested this 3-days-in-NY idea, I had no idea how to find an apartment for just a few days and I didn't want to spend $2000/month on one. So I asked my brain, “Who can help?” Instantly, I thought of 2 people who have back apartments out of use. One is a woman that I just met, but who recently offered for me to stay during an impending snowstorm. I didn't end up needing it then, but how awesome that she had JUST offered this! So, I emailed her and though I can't stay here regularly, she's letting me stay this week to see how I like the 3-days idea!! And here's how amazing the Universe (and this woman) is – she lives ON CENTRAL PARK. I have a huge beautiful space with a private bathroom and entrance…. It's heaven.

So get some help – even if it's scary or you don't like asking, or you feel guilty. People want to help. Ask friends if they know someone who can help, go through your mental roladex, or reach out to a coach for guidance and support.

3. What is the NEXT step I can take? Sometimes, we become paralyzed because an idea is too big or it seems too much of a long-shot, so we just give up. This is when we must narrow down to one step. The first step of this NY idea was to talk to Josh. I was nervous and scared! This is where a lot of us chicken out, but I took a deep breath and told him my idea. He gave me a hug. He said he understood, and though it isn't his first choice for our marriage, he knows it will make me happy, and therefore, probably make our marriage better. (Great guy, right?!)

Then came the next step – email people (see above). Then the next one, to try it out once, and here I am, on this bus. Renting a whole apartment felt too big right now, so I just needed to do it once and see. Then if I like it, do it once more. And then once more. And then in time, if it's the right solution for my own success and happiness, then we'll rent more permanent space.

So boil it down to one small step. Then another small step. Just one. If you want to write a book, take out a pen. If you want to become a Vice President, download a book on leadership. One step and watch how taking action leads to more action!

friend, I've used these 3 questions to do everything in life – from pursuing my purpose to moving across the country to creating my first retreat in Paris. It always works!

So what have you been wanting to do that would make you happier and/or more successful? Ask for a promotion? Learn a new skill? Start a business? Pursue a creative purpose?

Ask yourself these 3 questions and watch yourself take flight! And again, if you need help, reach out. Email me here! I have space for 2 new coaching clients and I'd be happy to host a free 30 minute consultation with you to discover how you can achieve your goals and to see if coaching is for you.

With so much love!
XO,
Carin