Carin Rockind

PurposeGirl

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The PurposeGirl Podcast Episode 009: The Dark Side

We all have a dark side, we all feel dark, heavy emotions like anger and grief, and as women we’ve been told to keep a lid on our darkness. Nice girls don’t curse. Nice girls smile a lot. We shouldn’t “get emotional.” But that’s all nonsense. The darkness is a part of who we are; we can’t have the light without the darkness. And if we try to suppress these difficult feelings, if we try to stuff them down and ignore them, they bubble up and explode, and they usually explode at someone near us, maybe our loved ones. Emotions need to be expressed. They represent a part of you that wants you to pay attention to it, and we need to give them voice and space so we can move through them.

Emotions aren’t good or bad; every emotion is valuable because it gives us information. Even the more challenging emotions tell us that we desire something, or that something is missing, or that we need something. Emotions can be our best teachers because they reveal what we truly value, and when we know what we value we can act on this.

I share with you new and healthier ways of viewing your emotions, the “good” and the “bad” ones, what you can do with the challenging emotions, and what can happen to you if you handle these emotions improperly or try to suppress them. And I end with three Purpose Power Tips.

It would really mean a lot to me if you would go to iTunes and leave me a review (hopefully a great one!), leave a 5 star rating, subscribe to this podcast so you never miss an episode, and download the episodes! And please spread the word and help our community grow!

May you live purposefully, may you love yourself, and may you love life.

Bye for now!

 

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The PurposeGirl Podcast Episode 009: The Dark Side

We all have a dark side, we all feel dark, heavy emotions like anger and grief, and as women we’ve been told to keep a lid on our darkness. Nice girls don’t curse. Nice girls smile a lot. We shouldn’t “get emotional.” But that’s all nonsense. The darkness is a part of who we are; we can’t have the light without the darkness. And if we try to suppress these difficult feelings, if we try to stuff them down and ignore them, they bubble up and explode, and they usually explode at someone near us, maybe our loved ones. Emotions need to be expressed. They represent a part of you that wants you to pay attention to it, and we need to give them voice and space so we can move through them.

Emotions aren’t good or bad; every emotion is valuable because it gives us information. Even the more challenging emotions tell us that we desire something, or that something is missing, or that we need something. Emotions can be our best teachers because they reveal what we truly value, and when we know what we value we can act on this.

I share with you new and healthier ways of viewing your emotions, the “good” and the “bad” ones, what you can do with the challenging emotions, and what can happen to you if you handle these emotions improperly or try to suppress them. And I end with three Purpose Power Tips.

It would really mean a lot to me if you would go to iTunes and leave me a review (hopefully a great one!), leave a 5 star rating, subscribe to this podcast so you never miss an episode, and download the episodes! And please spread the word and help our community grow!

May you live purposefully, may you love yourself, and may you love life.

Bye for now!

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The PurposeGirl Podcast Episode 008: Pleasure

We cannot live our purpose, our best lives, if we are not also focused on our own pleasure. Today we’re talking about your fun, your pleasure, so you can be the happiest you have ever been.

We all have such busy lives, and far too many of us don’t make our own enjoyment of life a priority. I’ve certainly been guilty of this. I get so busy with work and family and all sorts of obligations that I can forget to do things that give me pleasure. And this is a serious issue, because doing things that bring us pleasure is actually very important to our own health and well-being!

What do pleasurable experiences have to do with the part of our brain that has to do with creativity, trusting and connecting with others, and warding off stress? Amazingly, brain scans show that this region is lit up when we experience positive emotions! Pleasure isn’t a nice-to-have; it’s a must have! Most women I know put their own desire for pleasure last, they put it after the needs of others, and when they do take some time for themselves they feel guilty.

But this needs to stop. We must value our own pleasure and take responsibility for making sure we experience a good amount of pleasure in our lives. This can be taking dance breaks in the middle of the day, laughing and being silly with girlfriends, or something sexual. Feeling pleasure has clearly identified positive effects on a number of systems in our bodies, and it’s not only easy to incorporate into our daily routine, it has positive impacts in a number of areas of our lives.

In this episode I discuss the importance of sexual pleasure in our lives, the importance of being comfortable with and embracing our desire for sexual pleasure, and our responsibility for our own pleasure, sexual and otherwise.

I also recommend Regina’s Thomashauer’s book, Pussy: A Reclamation; here’s a link to it at Amazon. And I end with three Purpose Power Tips about how to increase the pleasure in your life.

It would really mean a lot to me if you would go to iTunes and leave me a review (hopefully a great one!), leave a 5 star rating, subscribe to this podcast so you never miss an episode, and download the episodes! And please spread the word and help our community grow!

May you live purposefully, may you love yourself, and may you love life.

Bye for now!

By Leave a Comment

The PurposeGirl Podcast Episode 008: Pleasure

We cannot live our purpose, our best lives, if we are not also focused on our own pleasure. Today we’re talking about your fun, your pleasure, so you can be the happiest you have ever been.

We all have such busy lives, and far too many of us don’t make our own enjoyment of life a priority. I’ve certainly been guilty of this. I get so busy with work and family and all sorts of obligations that I can forget to do things that give me pleasure. And this is a serious issue, because doing things that bring us pleasure is actually very important to our own health and well-being!

What do pleasurable experiences have to do with the part of our brain that has to do with creativity, trusting and connecting with others, and warding off stress? Amazingly, brain scans show that this region is lit up when we experience positive emotions! Pleasure isn’t a nice-to-have; it’s a must have! Most women I know put their own desire for pleasure last, they put it after the needs of others, and when they do take some time for themselves they feel guilty.

But this needs to stop. We must value our own pleasure and take responsibility for making sure we experience a good amount of pleasure in our lives. This can be taking dance breaks in the middle of the day, laughing and being silly with girlfriends, or something sexual. Feeling pleasure has clearly identified positive effects on a number of systems in our bodies, and it’s not only easy to incorporate into our daily routine, it has positive impacts in a number of areas of our lives.

In this episode I discuss the importance of sexual pleasure in our lives, the importance of being comfortable with and embracing our desire for sexual pleasure, and our responsibility for our own pleasure, sexual and otherwise.

I also recommend Regina’s Thomashauer’s book, Pussy: A Reclamation; here’s a link to it at Amazon. And I end with three Purpose Power Tips about how to increase the pleasure in your life.

It would really mean a lot to me if you would go to iTunes and leave me a review (hopefully a great one!), leave a 5 star rating, subscribe to this podcast so you never miss an episode, and download the episodes! And please spread the word and help our community grow!

May you live purposefully, may you love yourself, and may you love life.

Bye for now!

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Ever Feel Lonely?

Hi love,

Last week, I shared with you my passion for eradicating the crazy amount of depression and anxiety among women (read it here) and I have been blown away by your responses. Thank you for wanting to end depression with me.

Your encouragement led me to further think about the causes of women's depression and a major one is loneliness.

We're isolated.
Saying hi to each other in school pick up lines and in the breakroom, but we're often hiding our truth.
We're keeping quiet instead of speaking up.
We're running households and businesses, trying to do it all by ourselves.
And it's not working.

I remember being married to my first husband and feeling so lonely, even though he was in the bed next to me. I remember being with a group of girlfriends feeling so lonely because they all had kids and I didn't. I remember feeling so lonely in high school when I loved a girl and felt like I couldn't tell anyone. I remember being in middle school feeling so lonely because I wasn't invited to Movie Night.

Just recently, I felt lonely, like no one would get my anxiety, like no one would love me if they knew my pain. I texted my Soul Sister Stacey that I needed support, but then felt guilty. She has kids and a thriving business. She didn't need to care for me too! But she said, “We process in sisterhood. No aloneness.” (Thank Goddess for her!)

It's actually a huge reason why I create Sisterhoods – on retreats, in my EMPOWERED program, and in my upcoming science of women's happiness program – I create the Sisterhoods I always craved. Just this weekend, Stacey and I co-led a beautiful, transformative retreat where each woman listened to one another deeply, we mirrored one another's beauty, we celebrated each others' gifts, and we lifted each other up to be the brave Goddesses we see. As one participant told us at the end, “I feel so full now – so nurtured.”

What about you? Do you ever get lonely? 

With screens and social media, we're becoming lonelier. We have more “friends” but less Soul Sisters. And we need Soul Sisters.

Research shows that a major cause of women's midlife depression is that between demanding work schedules, aging parents and young kids, time with girlfriends is one of the first things to go. But research also shows that women need other women. Women with close friends are healthier and happier. 

Needing other women is in our bones.
It's in our DNA.
Think about it – we're the product of our ancestors and for thousands of years, women gathered to care for and nurture each other. Just two generations ago – my grandmother gathered with her girlfriends to play mahjong three times a week. That gathering, that need for connection is in our bones.

It's why women I work with say this:
“Because of you, I've met my best friends for life.”
“I never knew how much I needed other women, but my Sisters have lifted me higher than I ever could have gone alone.”
“This Sisterhood is everything to me.”

This is so important, that I taped this video for you.

If you're interested in learning more about women's depression and anxiety and being part of the solution and you haven't yet emailed me, then email me and say “YES!” I'm working on what a movement to change our well-being forever would look like and I'd love to be in Sisterhood with you.

With so much love,
Carin

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