This week, I've been sitting with a simple – and yet complex – question: What if?
What if you really could achieve that goal you've been thinking about?
What if you could have the love you desire?
What if you do follow your purpose?
It's so powerful, yet most of us often ask ourselves this very question… in the negative.
What if I fail?
What if they don't like me?
What if I get rejected and my big dream is over?
Just writing this breaks my heart. I know the pain of allowing these questions to stop me from even starting a goal. And then I end up feeling small, inadequate, less than. If I'm being 100% honest, which I always try to be with you, then I know this is why I haven't written a book yet. I'm too afraid of humiliation.
But what if I don't fail? What if you love the book? What if I change lives with it?
Now that makes me excited and happy! 🙂
Worrying about what might go wrong is part of our evolutionary makeup. If our early ancestors worried about the winter, they stocked up on food. But we're not in danger of dying. Embarrassment? Maybe. Failure? I guess. But even if I publish a book that no one likes, at least I will have done it. And that's something to be proud of!
When you get stuck in the negative without giving the positive its fair weight, it's called “negativity bias” and it can ruin your life.
It almost ruined something really wonderful for me recently. Just last week, I held my first F*Midlife Club group mentorship call and it was AMAZING! We have dozens of women who are engaged and ready to take charge of their lives.
But it almost didn't happen.
The first time I mentioned it to all of you, no one signed up. Panic set in. “What if no one signs up?” “What if I have to tell my experts I failed?” UGH. Negativity flooded my brain until I was ready to give up. That's when I knew to grab control and flip it.
1. Answer your negative “What if…?” For example, “What if no one signs up?” Answer? I'll live. Or, Then it wasn't meant to be and I'll work on another offering for you.
2. Flip it to a positive “What if…?” For example, “What if LOTS of women sign up?” Answer? Then I'll get to serve and support amazing people in a way I've dreamed of!
3. Now ask “How can I?” Take the positive flip and brainstorm how to bring it to fruition. For example, “How can I bring this to lots of women?” Answer? Hold live calls, offer referral bonuses, do Facebook Live videos, do a Facebook post.
4. Then get to work! Take those ideas and make them happen.
You got this, love. Because, you know… WHAT IF YOU'RE AS CAPABLE AND BRILLIANT as I believe you are??? 🙂