Carin Rockind

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October 18, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

When everything falls apart – Turn Pain into Purpose

Have you ever felt like a part of life came crashing down and there was nothing you could do about it?
Me too. I found out Monday that the radio show I'm regularly on abruptly went off the air – no explanation, no “here's what's next,” nothing.
At first I went into shock. I searched everywhere to hear that it was a joke. When I realized it was true, my heart went to the show host, my friend and colleague who is super-talented and every listener's best friend.

Then I had a moment of worry for me. The show allows me to inspire millions of women and it's my dream.

Yet just this weekend, I had a “knowing” that I was ready for new opportunities. I led 14 women on retreat in the Poconos and during a hike in the woods, I noticed how easily trees shed their leaves in the fall. I realized that in order to make room for new, we have to release something that no longer serves us.

I looked around at the beautiful women with me, in awe of how they supported and uplifted each other. No judgment – just love. I knew I wanted to create more opportunities for women to shine like this, so I asked myself, “What do
I need to release to be my best self?”

Then 24 hours later, the show was canceled and was released for me. It was a shock and not what I “wanted,” but maybe it's what I need. For a long time, I've wanted to start a podcast, finish my book, and get on the women's empowerment conference circuit. I've wanted to focus on my family. I've wanted to expand, but I was afraid.

Clearly, the Universe is telling me that it's time to pursue all that my heart desires and the same is true for YOU!!!!

Whatever is leaving your life – a lover breaks up with you, you lose your job, or you get passed over for a promotion – it's for purpose. It hurts like hell in the moment and you'll want to scream and shout and cry and eat lots of chocolate (I did all of this yesterday), but it's for your best. I see this all the time with clients who were unsatisfied in a relationship or job but were too afraid to leave, and then once forced out, found something much better. Under the fear, you can find hope. Let yourself grieve fully – and then get honest with yourself and use this as an opportunity. 

Ask yourself: What else is possible? One year from today, what do I hope to have? What do I want to do? Fill in this sentence: By this time next year, I'll create… 

I want to create a movement of women who inspire, empower, and uplift each other. I envision a global sisterhood where women feel safe, held, and encouraged. I want girls
to know that they are beautiful as is. I see auditoriums of hundreds of women and girls believing in each other and encouraging each other to go for their dreams! I want every woman on earth to:

  • Stand in her power
  • Speak her voice
  • Pursue her dreams
  • Love herself
  • Lift others up!

So what do you really, really, really want to create? And in order to have it, what do you need to release? How can use use the pieces of what feels like the world crumbling to create something beautiful?

We'll create something new together. Have a beautiful week!

xo,
Carin

Filed Under: Purpose Tagged With: Change, Pain and Loss

September 11, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Starting Over

Hi friend,

You can start over again.
You can decide that today is a new day.
You can choose what you do and how, no matter what's going on in life.
You can love yourself and your life right now by APPRECIATING WHAT IS. 

That's the message that came through loud and clear on my birthday last week. Two days beforehand, I was rushed to the ER, thinking I was having a heart attack. Fortunately, all checked out and I'm super healthy, but it was definitely a wake-up call for me.

It made me ask:

  • How do I want to live?
  • What matters most?
  • What is all this for?

This isn't the first time I've asked these questions, and it probably won't be the last. We go through spirals in life – ups and downs and curves – and we often have to get off track in order to begin again more strongly.

Every moment – even the challenges – is for purpose.

Often, the challenges show us how strong we are, how resourceful, resilient and capable we are. Often, challenges make us appreciate what we have even more.

I've been watching the hurricanes and praying for the survivors, sending money and packages, wondering how people will rebuild everything. And then this weekend I met a family who escaped Miami with nothing but their passports, their wedding photo, and a whole lot of gratitude that they were alive, together, and able to afford to get away. They knew they could start again.

And here we are on 9/11, an anniversary that reminds us of how resilient we are, and shows us that we can not only start over, but that the challenge can empower us to rebuild higher and become stronger.

I was teaching this concept in a workshop at PBS headquarters last week, and we all realized that we have done this in our lives and can do so again. You can do this, too. You can look at any challenge you're having as a catalyst for growth. From going off of your diet, to overwhelm with kids going back to school, to a parent's illness, to abandoning your dream of being a writer, you can start again. You can use it as fuel for growth and let desire consume your mind so that you choose for this to be a moment of purpose.

This is not to minimize the pain or suffering, or to say, “Just get over it.” You must feel all of it, being gentle with yourself and allowing grief. And then you can grow.

Post-Traumatic Growth (PTG) is rising to a new level of functioning as the result of adversity. In other words, it's growing not “despite” challenge, but because of it. Researchers Tedeschi and Calhoun found that we all can experience PTG and not just start again, but start better, stronger, and more alive.

So what challenge are you experiencing? How can it help you grow? Here are a few questions to journal about:

  • What does this experience show me about my strength and courage?
  • What do I now appreciate as a result of this?
  • Which relationships can this help me to strengthen?
  • What wisdom do I wish I had known? (Said another way, what would I now share with a 20 year old to help them manage this?)
  • What would it look like to choose a new way?

So my love, what do you need to do this afternoon or tomorrow to start again? How will you choose to treat a new day? What will you promise to love about yourself and your life right now, as is? I'd love to hear from you.

With so much love,
Carin

PS – If you're struggling with overcoming a current or past challenge, email me. It's my honor to do a 30-minute call with you and identify what you want and where the blocks are.

If you want to discover who you are and your true purpose… if you're ready to claim your birthright of joy and self-love, if your heart is calling for transformation this fall, then I invite you to email me now. I can't wait to connect with you!

Filed Under: Purpose Tagged With: Change, Motivation, Pain and Loss, Post-Traumatic Growth

August 21, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Making Changes

Good morning friend!

If you could change anything in your life, what would it be?
So what's stopping you?

I'm typing to you from a Bed & Breakfast where I'm hosting a client for a VIP Intensive to help her step into her full power. When we planned this months ago, I had no idea that today would be the solar eclipse, but I'm so glad it is.

This is a powerful week of change and it's already begun. This past week broke my heart. As the grandchild of Holocaust survivors, I'm a proud Jewish woman. My grandparents (and millions of other Jews, Catholics, Gypsies, Disabled, and many others) suffered at the hands of HATE.

If you're like me, the events in Charlottesville left you confused, angry, sad, and frustrated about what you can do about it.

You have the ability to make change and it starts with YOU. You becoming the brave, bold, purposeful person you were born to be.

With the eclipse – the moment when the moon (feminine energy) moves over the sun (masculine energy) – it's the perfect time to awaken the fierce warrior of love within. We all have feminine and masculine energies within us. The masculine is the “DOing” and the feminine is the “BEing”. The divine fierce feminine is the place of:

  • Unconditional love and acceptance
  • Compassion and truth
  • Passion and creativity
  • Protection like a lion over her cubs

Whether you're a man or a woman, change begins by allowing yourself to express the powerful feminine within and here's how.

3 steps:

1. CLEAR: We all live with a lot of clutter – in our homes, at our desks and in our minds – and in all that chaos and noise, you can't hear your heart's desire or soul's purpose. A lot of our clutter represents the past – clothes that no longer fit, underwear that should have been thrown out long ago, and regrets or worries about what you should have done or what someone else did (or is doing/will do) to hurt you. During this eclipse, clear out the old and make space for new changes. Physically clear space in your closet or desk. Mentally, write a letter of forgiveness (even if you never send it) or make a list of the nasty thoughts in your head and burn it. Take time this week to clear.

2. STILL: Your life will control you unless you take charge to control it. Your mind will run crazy unless you decide to focus it. You must slow down and get still to hear what's in your heart. Something in you wants more. Something in you yearns to make a difference. Something in your heart is calling you forward. Today and this week, take 10 – 15 minutes every morning to breathe, meditate, stretch your body and journal. Here's a link to one of my meditations to help you. When you journal, ask your heart questions, like “How do you want to feel?” “What matters most?” If your mind answers, tell it thank you, and then get back to your heart.

3. PASSION: Now is the time to awaken the divine purpose within you. You have strengths and talents and wisdom that the world needs now. What cause have you wanted to get involved in? Who could benefit from your story? You have a unique Purpose Power that is yours alone and it's inside of you. Let yourself take action this week – action from a place of love (not fear), passion (not apathy), and compassion (not hate).

Here's to your making changes from your Purpose Power!

With so much love,
Carin

Filed Under: Empowerment Tagged With: Change, Change Agent, Motivation

July 25, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Don’t Let Your Dreams Die With You

7 years ago, my friend Ed drowned to death, and I couldn't save him. I dedicate this post to him.

It was a beautiful July morning, just 5 weeks before I was heading off to graduate school for Positive Psychology to finally pursue my dreams. My friend Ed had never been on a boat, and had never been in Lake Erie either. I couldn't wait to take him out.

So a week later, he met me at the dock and we began taking on the free waters. He laughed and shouted with joy. I'd never seen him so happy!

We then anchored and with a huge smile on his face, Ed dove in. I immediately saw that he was struggling, so I turned the boat to be a bit closer to him. He didn't move so I started throwing him a rope screaming, “Ed, get the rope!!! ED, GET THE ROPE!! EDDDDDDDD GET THE ROPE!!!!!

Seconds later, his head fell below the surface of the water, and he never came back up.

After weeks of trauma wanting to give up on school and life, I finally learned that Ed's body had been chock full of cocaine. Apparently, after being rejected from the military two weeks earlier, he turned to heavy drugs to numb the pain. It's like he had a death wish.

Ed's death is a constant reminder of why we must live our purpose WHILE WE'RE ALIVE.

What are you waiting for?

Why aren't you going for it fully? If you're like me, you're scared. Years ago, I sat on my KNOWING that I was here to inspire and support you because I was too afraid of leaving my safe job. I was too afraid of being rejected. I was so afraid of failing. So I stayed stuck. And then the pain of being stuck became so bad that I got sick until eventually the pain of staying stuck became worse than the fear of possibly failing. I knew that if I came to the end of my days without ever trying to live this purpose, I'd regret it forever.

Do you want your dreams to die with you like Ed's did? Why do you have painting talent if not to share your gift with others? Why do you have ideas about politics, if not to help your community? I know it's scary, and I know that your brilliance is not meant to die.

Your purpose is bigger than you. If you have a book idea, then those words are meant to help someone else. What good do those words do sitting in your journal and dying with you in the grave? If you dream of starting an animal shelter, it's because there are puppies in mills who need your help. Do you want to die with them?

This may sound dramatic, but having survived being robbed at gunpoint and having lived through Ed's death, I know too well how short life is.

Do not let your dreams die with you. And if you don't know what your dreams are, and you only know that you feel stuck and lost, then let this be your wake up call to start the process of figuring it out.

Find a mentor, join a mastermind, do a program to get clarity on who you are and what you want.

No matter what you do, take action today. For Ed. Ed's legacy lives on through us following our hearts. Sending so much love to Ed's family.

With so much love,
Carin


PurposeGirls on Fire – Real success stories of people who are going for it!

Brigid had always wanted to be an artist. She just loved painting and had always loved the stroke of a brush. But as a young girl, she kept seeing commercials for “starving artists.” She didn't want to starve, so understandably, she gave up painting. Brigid went on to start a successful printing business with her partner, but twenty years into her business and life as wife and mother, she lost her spark. Life took over and she became depleted. She heard about my offer for a free 30-minute call and within moments of talking, she declared her desire for change. She joined my EMPOWERED program and within our first two weeks of working together, Brigid remembered her first love: being an artist. She came home from the first EMPOWERED retreat so light that everyone at home noticed a change. She started painting at home and began to feel alive. She then started bringing her art talent to her business, and she felt on purpose. Doing graphic design, creating new project ideas, and bravely sharing her talent with clients, for the first time in a long time, Brigid fell in love with life. She knew she needed more space to create, so she asked her partner if they could get rid of the futon in the spare bedroom so that she could set up a studio. Just a few weeks ago, Brigid not only set up her studio, but she also sold her first painting! No “starving artist” for her!! I love this photo of her painting with the woman who bought it, and I love this picture of the FIRST (but not last) check she's received for her painting talent. Join me in CONGRATULATING Brigid on being a kickass woman on purpose. To learn more about her and her graphics arts, painting and printing business, check out Creative Characters here.

Filed Under: Purpose Tagged With: Change, Motivation, Pain and Loss, Post-Traumatic Growth

June 4, 2017 By Carin Rockind Leave a Comment

Will Money Make You Happier?

Hi friend,

Quick question (and answer with your gut and without judgment): Does money make you happier?

According to research, after around $75,000, research shows that money doesn't make you that much happier. However, I know that I want more than $75,000 and I bet that if I gave you $10,000 right now, you'd be thrilled!

See, we want money, but most of us have a love/hate relationship with it:

  • You need it to live, so it's holding you back from starting your dream business.
  • You're thrilled to get new Jimmy Choos, but hate paying your credit card bill.
  • You're dying to go to Paris, but feel guilty spending the money.

Recently, a woman emailed me that she NEEDED to come on one of my retreats. She has been in a horrible relationship, she's stressed from her new boss, and she has completely lost herself since becoming a mom. However, she said she couldn't afford it. When probing, it turns out that she has money to go out to lunch every day (because she has no time to pack it!), for fast food a couple times a week, and for a gym membership she never uses. Money isn't her issue – self-love is. But she blames money rather than realizing how easy it is to shift how she spends it and to make more! (More on that below.)

For years, I had a love/hate relationship with money. I secretly wanted it, but told other people that I didn't because I thought that money was dirty. It made people snotty and gross and I would rather do GOOD in the world than do WELL financially.

What a ridiculous statement! As if I can't both do well and do good!!

I needed to change my “money story”: The narrative you've created around money that lies deep in your subconscious. It tells you that there isn't enough of it, that making money is hard, that rich people are obnoxious like your Uncle Jim, and that money is for other people.

Whatever your story, it isn't your fault. You learned your story from your parents, grandparents, church, community, television, etc. My dad said that money didn't grow on trees (yes it does – it's paper!!), my grandparents saved tea bags so I learned that money is sparse, yet I grew up in a ridiculously wealthy area where kids drove their BMWs to school so I felt “less than” around them. (No wonder I had a messed up money story!)

The key for money happiness to is to become friends with it, and here's how (I've bolded my faves):

  1. Change your money story: Identify your old narrative, check it out for accuracy and then change your story to a new one of abundance. For instance, is it true that money is sparse? No – there is enough money to feed the world; it just needs to be distributed differently!
  2. See money as energy exchange: Money helps you buy what you want; your current job is the first investor in your new business; realize that your contribution to society is worthy of great contribution back.
  3. Be grateful to money: Gratitude tells the brain (and the universe) what you want more of, so…Before you eat your steak dinner, be grateful for the abundance to afford it, be grateful when paying your bills for your clean water and gas stove, be grateful when paying your taxes for the firemen and police and roads and schools that they build. Positivity begets positivity.
  4. Use your money intentionally. Think about how much money you BLOW and have no idea where it went. A glass of Cabernet here, a few Starbucks coffees there, that shirt with the tags still on from 2016… YOU ALWAYS HAVE MONEY FOR WHAT YOU NEED AND WANT. That is a universal law. So if you feel like you don't have money, think about what you want and spend there.
  5. Make money PURPOSEFUL: You were born with a specific purpose on earth. You're here to use your unique gifts to make the world a better place. Know that the Universe wants you to live your purpose, so be clear about what that is, how abundance can help, and believe it's coming.
  6. Have an abundance mindset. See abundance in everything you own, every little gift that comes your way, and every rose that's in full bloom. A positive healthy mindset matters!
  7. Use your money to buy EXPERIENCES. Research is really clear about this one. Experiences give us lasting memories so every time you look at your Snapfish book, the money keeps paying off in more appiness! Plus, planning experiences, like vacations, give us happy anticipation, which researchers show
     further elongates the happiness! And, experiences are often with people you like, so that heightens your happiness even more. Spending money on experiences literally makes your dollar stretch into more happiness!

The most important thing is to KNOW WHY YOU WANT MONEY! Not just “I want it” – that won't make you happier! But, that trip to Miami with Carin and Taylor will transform my life! Or, starting my own business will give me freedom! That's how to set your mind and the energy in motion!

And here's the best part: Abundance IS everywhere. Below are 10 things you can do RIGHT NOW to make more money. If Jim Carrey can go from growing up in a trailer to making people laugh all over the world, you can make money for your dreams, too! Here are a few quick ways to bring in money TOMORROW!

  1. Sell something on eBay. I'm sure your house is LOADED with stuff other people would love.
  2. Put flyers in mailboxes offering to mow lawns. Cha-ching!
  3. Offer to babysit your neighbor's kids. ($10-$15/hour!)
  4. Get crafty and make something that you can sell for fun on Etsy.
  5. Have a bake sale or lemonade stand outside of your home. Mmmm!
  6. Host a garage sale.
  7. Ask your neighbors to host a garage sale and offer to market it for a small % of their earnings.
  8. Get a “side hustle” going – a part-time job or part-time entrepreneurial start-up where you sell your talent on sites like Fiverr, UpWork, or TaskRabbit. (Do you know someone will pay you to pick up their dry cleaning??!)
  9. Become an Amazon affiliate and make money every time you recommend a product to someone else and they buy it!
  10. Set up a KickStarter campaign! I've had people pay for their classes with me using KickStarter because their happiness and them living their purpose will improve others' lives! So others said, “Yes, I'm down to make your dreams come true!”

Like I always say, everything is possible. You just have to get clear about why you want it, excited for it to happen, and believe in yourself so much that you're willing to make yourself get creative, vulnerable, and persistent for it. That's how I created this business and if I can do it, so can you!

And PS – if you want ONE OF THE BEST EXPERIENCES OF YOUR LIFE – one that will pay Happiness dividends for years, join me and Taylor Strecker of SiriusXM for the Goddess Girls Retreat Aug. 4 – 6 in South Beach. You will awaken your true heart's true desires, learn tools to change your “story,” and walk away with confidence and clarity to create a life you love. Click here for more information. We only have a few spots left, so if this interests you, click here to join now!

With so much love,
Carin

Filed Under: Happiness Tagged With: Change, Happiness

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