Hi Love,
Have you ever wished that all of the struggle and all of the pain and all of the worry would just go away, so that you can finally be happy? Me too.
And yet, life doesn’t work that way. Every single one of us has challenges. Every single one of us feels pain. Life is one big roller coaster filled with incredible highs, and horrendous lows. None of us can escape this.
When you learn to accept the roller coaster of life, you can learn to work with it towards happiness.
Welcome to Happiness Key #4: Ride the Ups and Downs
If you’ve been following my blog this summer, then you know that I’ve been writing a series: 5 Keys to Happiness {AKA What I Learned on My Summer Vacation}. Vacation makes you feel so free, so alive, so serene that I want us to learn how to feel that way every day. In case you missed it, Key #1 was LIVE FREEDOM (read it here), Key #2: SAVOR (read it here), and Key #3: CHERISH the people you love (read it here).
On our summer vacation, we took my stepson to Cedar Point, the self-proclaimed (and I agree) “Roller Coaster Capital of the World.” I 
practically grew up at Cedar Point and I loved showing them how I used to ride.
But, oh my, have the rides changed. They are faster, taller, and have more spins, they leave you hanging in thin air and turn you so topsy-turvy upside down that you think you may throw up. And so it is with life.
You meet a new love interest, and your heart soars! A loved one dies, and you fall to your knees. Living well is using every challenge as fuel for purpose. Life is about being strong, not despite your downs but because of them.
Last week, I shared that Josh and I have been seeing a fertility doctor – an experience that turns you so upside-down, you can't help but question your life. No one thinks they’ll need fertility treatments; our bodies are supposed to be able to do this perfectly on their own. But I’m 41 and chose to delay having children, so this is an upside-down turn that I have to accept.
The question is what I do with this roller coaster of emotions. Do you stay in the valley of darkness, anger, and bitterness or rise up in strength? I wanted to stay down for a couple of days. I was mad at my doctor for hammering me about my age. I have been angry at the universe for our miscarriage. But that doesn’t help us move toward our goal.
You have to accept the roller coaster, and then work with it.
So I got quiet. I dropped in and listened deep inside of my belly. What I heard is to reach out to others and gather stories of HOPE. What transpired was a beautiful Facebook thread of heartfelt, vulnerable posts, and generous offers of support. From a down, we created an up of positivity and community. (Read the thread here).
My inner wisdom then said to take good care of myself. So I contacted an accupuncturist and began daily fertility meditation. I have no idea if we’ll get pregnant this month, but I feel at peace, and that is what matters. My mind and body and soul are aligned, I am clear on my purpose.
This is how to ride the roller coaster. Accept it. And then lean into yourself with love.
For years, I just wanted to get rid of the downs. Ignore it, pretend life is fine. But it isn't. The pain remains in your body and will eventually come out as rage, depression, or illness. I’ve experienced all three.
Listen, if you sweep shit under the rug long enough, eventually it’s going to start to stink.
See, happiness does not come from eliminating the downs, but riding and embracing them. It’s how you work through the challenges, and rise up from them that matters! Happiness comes from living fully and sucking the juice out of every morsel of life – the good and the bad.
At Cedar Point, my stepson insisted that we sit front row on every ride. What a brilliant young man. Though it frightened me to death, 
he forced me to face my fears. He challenged me to embrace the challenge head on, and to enjoy the ride. (This is us – in the front row!)
Live from the front row. Ride the roller coaster. Every pain, every tragedy, and every sorrow holds wisdom and strength.
So ride the roller coaster. Be resilient through challenges. Allow the downs and accept them as part of human life. Embrace yourself through them with love. And then work with the downs to uncover the wisdom, strength, courage, and love to exist.
With so much love,
Carin
PS – I am SO thrilled to announce the following programs for you to uncover your purpose and live the fierce, free life you desire:
SoulSpark: If you want to ignite your soul and create your path forward, join me for Soul Spark in Sonoma, a Goddess Girls Retreat! Imagine 4 days and 3 nights of luxury in wine country with a pool, jacuzzi and Goddess awakening exercises. Plus, SoulSpark comes with 2 group coaching sessions, 6 recorded meditations, and a workbook to ignite your soul for the year to come. Open to only 8 women – Join us for this exclusive opportunity!
Positive Psychology (CAPP): If you're a change agent who wants to expand your ability to make a difference in the world, join me for the Certificate in Applied Positive Psychology (CAPP) in Miami this Fall! We'll spend 7 weekends together throughout 6 months so you can escape the cold, and learn the science of happiness and human flourishing. This is perfect for educators, HR professionals, therapists, coaches, parents, and anyone wanting to improve the world. Click here for information and to join!
PPS – I am thrilled to share my second article in Live Happy's Online Magazine: 4 Powerful Tools to Overcome Shame. I felt so ashamed after my divorce at 26. In this article, I share how I overcame it, and how you can too. Enjoy!
FINALLY – Share the love! If you enjoy getting Positivity tips, so will your FRIENDS! Share it! Invite a friend to get these tips by sending them this link. Thanks for sharing the love!
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