Oh the brain is a kooky crazy thing!

I set aside the entire weekend to work on my book and then my animal instinct, fight/flight FEAR brain tried to stop me from working on it. Which brings me to your SPARK for the week: YOU CAN OVERCOME FEAR!

I have wanted to write a book forever. I remember sitting on the floor of Barnes & Noble CRYING when I was 28 because I had a book in me, but couldn't get it out. My brain made the sentences go round and round, my brain convinced me I had nothing important to say, my brain told me that getting a publisher would be too hard. And after ONE – just ONE – agent told me that the book I was working on wasn't “sellable,” I gave up. I just gave up and drowned myself in my own tears for years.

More than a decade later, I've promised that I would NOT let that happen again. And so I began this book. The book that I've talked about writing for years. The book that my heart has ached to publish since first discovering the magic of PURPOSE! The book I've never completed. I've made excuses, I've buried myself in other projects. But now… Now there is an agent interested… Now there is a publisher interested… And so I dedicated this whole weekend to be in my writing, organizing, purpose-serving BLISS!

Sounds awesome right?? Well not to my Fear brain. And so I began with morning meditation and journaling asking G-d to channel through me and felt so happy! Until…my computer wouldn't turn on – for an hour! And then my legs started itching, and my head began to ache, and tears began streaming down my face.

“You're stupid!” “See, you'll never write this book or any book!” “You suck!”

I wish I could say that some snotty, bully neighbor pelted these daggers at me… But they were my own internal voices. You know that nasty inner voice. You probably have one, too. What does your mean voice tell you? That you can't do it? That you're unlovable? That you don't deserve to spend money on yourself? That your dreams are “impractical?”

If I didn't know better, I'd just say that deep down, we're all harsh, nasty, bitches and bastards! But I do know better. This is the voice of our younger wounded selves, trying to keep us safe.

This is the voice of 7-year-old Little Carin who had to handle being the worst one on the soccer field. This is the voice of 10-year-old Carin who tried to keep me from feeling devastated when my group of friends decided they didn't like me anymore in fifth grade, and this is the voice of my 14-year-old who faced yet another student council rejection. This voice has been my BFF to keep me safe in a world full of rejection. This is simply, sweetly, the voice of fear trying to protect me. The same is true for you. That voice is Little You who was told somewhere at some time that you weren't good enough, or that you weren't wanted. That FEAR brain says, “If we are small, the tribe will still like us” or “If we are small, no one can hurt us and reject us.”

If this voice succeeds in keeping me from writing, then you – my readers, the agent, and the publisher can't reject me. She's trying to help!

And so, here is what I said to that voice: “Little Carin voice, I won't yell at you. I will hold you and tell you that even if the agent rejects us, there are others. Even if the publisher decides it doesn't want us, we can self-publish. Even if no one reads the book, I will have achieved a life-long goal by writing it.”

And then I felt more calm. More supported, more sweet, soft, and able to move forward. We are every age we have ever been! If your fears scream at you, hate on you, or berate you for not being good enough, recognize that they are just trying to keep you safe. Love them for they are the little you inside who created this voice at a time you needed it. And then get back to your purpose – your truth, your “why I'm serving the world” with your great gift, and GET BACK to it!

The world needs you living your purpose. And you need to live it to feel truly fulfilled.

And so I overcame my fear. Without a computer, I wrote down every concept, I organized the content, I structured each chapter, and I began my outline. WOOHOO!! It FEELS SO GOOD TO OVERCOME FEAR! No more fear – just me and my truth. Me and my purpose. On a mission to help you live yours.

And so, what nastiness is your brain telling you about a dream? How old is that fear brain? How is he/she trying to keep you safe? Love that little one inside and move on because YOU can overcome fear!

xo,
Carin

ps – On Friday, I officially announced Purpose in Paris – the transformational adventure of a lifetime! Join me and other love-hearted souls in the most beautiful, most inspiring city in the world to embrace your true essence, express your true joy, and become empowered to live fully. Several of you have emailed me already about it – this trip is going to amazing! Join me! Click here for more info and/or email me to talk about the trip and we will chat. If your fear is trying to stop you, let's talk and we will figure out how to overcome those fears and make this experience POSSIBLE for you! xoxoxo

Bonjour!!!

I am BEYOND excited to finally, officially share this news…PurposeGirl is going to Paris!!!  Will you join me??

My love, have you ever wanted to just get away? To explore, to awaken, to soar? To have someone else take care of all your needs while you just soaked in all of the magic that this beautiful world has to offer?

Introducing Purpose in Paris, your opportunity to indulge all of your senses, awaken your spirit, express your soul, and shine your light – all with like-hearted, incredible women…IN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL CITY IN THE WORLD!

Join me on this life-giving adventure, August 19 – 23, 2015. Can you imagine four days of me taking care of you? Four days of fresh food, crisp wine, delicate beauty, a luxurious hotel, and EMPOWERING energy? After four days of experiencing soulful Purpose in Paris with me, you will leave READY to ROCK OUT your life.

I have been in love with Paris since I was 15. My French teacher offered a class trip that I was DYING to go on. Paris called to me. The  intricate, delicate architecture, the beauty of French women's scarves, the tranquility of the Seine River, the awe-inspiring Notre Dame, the scent of fresh baguette… I HAD to go. And so I made it happen. I worked long hours at a pizza carry out to save the money to go. I remember first stepping foot on the savory soil and my soul melted.

Since then, I've returned to Paris twice by myself to awaken my spirit and embody my desires. Each time, I've left renewed, rejuvenated and full of LIFE! I've literally lit up, completely soaring with fresh creative energy that empowered me to succeed in my dreams. I want this for you.

Let me rejuvenate your soul and ignite your dreams in Paris.

On our Purpose in Paris adventure, you will fall in love with yourself at the Louvre as you embody the Mona Lisa, you will express your deepest desires as we paint atop Montmarte, as artists like Renoir have done for centuries. You will restore your strength as we meditate in the famous Luxembourg and Tuileries Gardens. You will ignite your dreams as you write along the Seine River, and cruise it at night. And as we savor fresh baguette, brie, and French delicacies, you will finally allow yourself to be FREE. And after four days of empowerment with me, you WILL TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE.

Will you join me for Puropse in Paris?

In January, I meditated on my deepest desires, and the Eiffel Tower lit up in my mind. I saw women popping champagne bottles as the gorgeous icon
ERUPTED in sparkling bling. Those women were you, me, and sisters, all ready to let our light shine.

When I was married the first time, I used to envy women who just picked up and followed their dreams. I thought that I could never have that life. I made excuses like it wasn't responsible, or it was too indulgent, or we couldn't afford it. And then I remembered that I had made it happen when I was 16. I could make it happen again. So can you, Joshua.

You can make every dream of your heart come true in real life. I am living proof. Let me show you how in the most magical city on earth.

Let me pamper you in Paris. I want to give this gift to you. After telling you all about my annual vacations with girlfriends, my retreats with my spiritual sisters, and my recent vacation to Italy, several of you have emailed saying you wish you could have that kind of rejuvenation. YOU CAN REALIZE EVERY DREAM. Let me show you how!

Join me in Paris, love! We need pampering, inspiration, beauty, and JOY to rejuvenate our souls, expand our creativity, and live on purpose. Oh my G-d, there is nothing like popping champagne as the Eiffel Tower lights up in BLING at night!

This is the bling of your heart, the light of your souls. Let's ignite your dreams and rejuvenate your soul. Join me for Purpose in Paris!

xoxoxo,
Carin

ps – This is going to be a transformative, life-giving experience. Join me! If you have any questions, or are worried about financing, or are hesitating and want to talk with me personally about the trip, email me and we will schedule a time to talk! My purpose is to inspire, encourage, and empower you to live yours, so we will figure it out together! xoxoxo

Hello love!

Greetings from Florida where I've just landed after being on a spiritual retreat in Sonoma, California, with women healers from around the world. Oh my goodness, it has REJUVENATED my soul! I feel light, alive, like I can FLY!

I've spent the last 4 days in meditation, yoga, play, dance, and deep soul-searching truth-telling. For four days, I dove deep into the truth of who I am at my essence, and I faced old fears, guilt and shame. Really old crap – like thinking that I have to be perfect and have it all together to be liked, like being afraid to ask for help, like thinking I have to do it all myself.

Maybe you can relate. You don't have to do it alone. You can't do it alone. We are social animals. We are born to co-create, collaborate, support and uplift each other. And when trying life alone, every bit of crap holds you back. You will wear yourself out, get really irritable, sometimes hate the world, sometimes just hide, and you will always dull your light.

You can't live on purpose or be truly happy when you are so depleted. You NEED to rejuvenate your soul.

Each of us is rejuvenated differently. Maybe you've been dying to go on a women's retreat like I did, but then talk yourself out of it, thinking your husband will never get it. Maybe you've yearned to travel the world but convince yourself it's frivolous to spend the money. Maybe you are dying to leave your job and start your own business, but you think you're being selfish. Maybe you just need an hour to yourself every week to simply be alone in nature and you've thought it was irresponsible to your family.

To please others, or to be perfect, or to not get rejected, you end up just doing the same ol' routine day after day, night after night, hiding or denying your true desires. And then you're left depleted. You're left looking in the mirror wondering who the heck you are, where your spirit went and what happened to that vibrant, fabulous girl you were.

You need to REJUVENATE YOUR SOUL!

When you feel depleted, tired, numb, lost, stuck, or empty, that's your sign that you need support to rejuvenate. The human brain NEEDS newness. The heart will tell you EXACTLY what will fill your soul.

What do you need to replenish your soul? Play? Girl time? Alone time? Travel? Whatever replenishes your soul, do that. Do ONE thing today that will replenish you. A walk, 15 minutes of meditation in the sun, a call with a friend. Then a different thing this weekend. And then commit to one big SOUL-GIVING, HEART-FULFILLING, LIFE-GENERATING rejuvenation this year.

What will make you SOAR? You may think you don't “know,” but you do. Deep in your heart, you know what you ache for. You know how you want to feel, and you have a dream of what will lead you there.  Once the image comes, meditate on it and consider this:

When your soul is ALIVE, you SOAR. When your soul is alive, you will earn more money, get more promotions, attract more friends, lovers, and sisters. The science is simple: happier people are more successful.

I taped this short video for you after my 4 days of rejuvenation. Notice how ALIVE I am after just a few days. And know that this feeling is possible for you too.

Enjoy your week of REJUVENATION, my love!

xo,
Carin

Hello!

Greetings from San Francisco where I spent the weekend teaching Positive Psychology to an incredible group of CHANGE agents! These folks are on fire and ready to impact the world!

Our work this weekend reminds me of today's important SPARK: YOU have the POWER!

As cheesy as that may sound, it is 100% true. Inside of you is a reserve of incredible willpower that you can assert to stay on track to your goals. Inside of you is the power to choose how you handle every bit of inevitable crap that comes your way.

I know it may seem hard to believe – maybe it seems like your husband or boss has the power. One of my clients has been running like a madwoman for her boss that emails her at 10 pm. Upon looking at the situation, we realized that she had set the expectation with him that she would respond that late. She had the power to shift her behavior and set a new expectation. Her boss had questions at first, and he got used to it.

You have the power. You get to control who your friends are, how you spend your time, what you do for a living, where you live, and how you deal with inevitable stress. I am not saying it's always easy to exert your power. I'm just saying it's possible.

You have the power. One of the best tools for standing in your full POWER is to know and exercise your STRENGTHS! That which is best about you.  Perhaps you are incredibly loving, or creative, or you have the gift of noticing excellence in others. You have strengths that are unique, energizing, and all your own. Rather than focus on who you aren't, use the strengths you have. For instance, instead of saying, “I wish I was more creative,” or “Why can't I be as organized as Jane” or “I should be a better leader,” instead, ask yourself what your best characteristic is, what friends always tell you is wonderful about you, and then SHINE in your true power. Research shows that when you use them, you are energized, and you elevate others.

That, my love, is how to be a PERSON ON PURPOSE! Stand in your power, use your strengths.

If you want to learn more about your POWER, remember that my TOTALLY FREE PurposePower Hour is TOMORROW, 5/19 at noon ET. These free monthly calls are my gift to you. Last month, I shared the secret magic of hope and optimism. Tomorrow, we are talking about “What is purpose?!” Register here!

And even if you can't join, please make this a week of POWER. Practice using willpower to stay on track, exert your power of choice to remain true to your needs, and allow your super unique strengths to SHINE!

With so, so, so much love!!!
xo,
Carin

Hello!

Last night, on a call with my coach and a circle of other women healers, I had to face a hard truth: Sometimes, I'm afraid to be my authentic self. I'm afraid that if you knew all of me – the good and the “bad”, you may no longer want to read my newsletters or work with me as a coach.

And yet, every time I hide some part of me, I feel sad, dull, defeated, and even depressed.

Perhaps you get the feeling. One of my clients is so well respected in her town that she feels like she can't go out for a drink. Another client is dying to explore her sexuality, but fears what her husband may think. What are you hiding because you're afraid of being judged and rejected?

One of the major factors of unhappiness is trying to be something you're not. It's exhausting to try to be super-mom, and totally depleting to pretend to love a job that you actually hate. So why are we continuing the madness?

Simple – we're afraid that if we're authentic, we might die. We're wired to want to belong. Think about it – if our ancestors were “different”, they may have been left out of the tribe to die at the mouths of saber-toothed tigers!

But today, we're dying a very different death. Death of spirit. Death of heart. Death of happiness. And since research shows that unhappiness is correlated with stress, heart disease, lowered immune system, increased colds, and more, WHY ARE WE STILL HIDING?

It's time to shift the paradigm and embrace our authentic selves. It's time to face what you've been hiding and LOVE that part of you wholly. Easier said than done, yes, and it's possible.

Recently a client nearly cried as she told me that everyone she knows is calling her crazy for wanting to leave her job and start her own animal care business. What these people don't realize is that my client feels trapped in beige walls sitting at a computer screen for 9 hours a day. Her current job DRAINS her and DULLS her. How is that “successful”? In that state, you can't reach ultimate success. Her soul comes alive in nature. Her heart speaks to animals. When she speaks about her new work, she LIGHTS UP!

When you're spirited and happy, your highest level thinking brain gets to work on creative solutions. So who's to say she can't make GREAT money in animal care?  My dog walker has 700 clients and 20 employees. Seems pretty “successful” to me!

The key to FLOURISHING is to be your authentic self. All of you. I used to be afraid to tell you that I sometimes get depressed. And once I shared this truth, I received several notes from readers saying they felt better knowing they weren't alone. I was also super afraid to share that I've loved a woman, and when I did, a couple of gay and bisexual friends THANKED me for making sexuality ok. You may not always like my authentic self, but hopefully, you'll respect me for owning it. And even if you unsubscribe, that will be okay too because I can love myself for showing up with integrity.

This is why I LOVE the host of SiriusXM's Wake-Up with Taylor, Taylor Strecker. She is so darned authentically herself on NATIONAL radio. She's honest about loving red wine and ice cream AND hating her body, she's candid about wanting to live freely, and sometimes, feeling trapped. She is so incredibly inspiring. Does everyone “love” her? No, but hundreds of thousands of people do and she's made AUTHENTICITY successful.

Which is why I am SO honored to co-host a webinar with Taylor on May 20 from 7 – 8:30 ET, called, “Succeed As You: Three Steps to Your Happiest, Most Authentic Selves.” We're sharing how we have stepped into our authenticity and empowering you to do the same. It's going to be like a big nation-wide slumber party! Check it out and join us!

And even if you can't join us, let this note be a reminder that your true, authentic self is waiting for you. Ask yourself, where am I denying myself something I desire? What do I wish I could tell other people? What dream have I stuffed down? And then, hug yourself and commit that somehow, some way, you will allow yourself to live on purpose, as you desire and deserve.

With so much love,
xoxo,
Carin